I fucked up my life. In high school, I was a straight A student who graduated sixth in my class of over 800. I was accepted to the University of Texas as an honors biomedical engineering student with a full scholarship. My first semester GPA was a 4.0.
Then I screwed it all up. My grades slipped, and I lost my scholarship. Engineering became philosophy, bringing constant questions of “Philosophy? What on earth are you going to do with that?” After five unsuccessful years, I dropped out and moved back home to live with my parents. While my friends were graduating and moving on to great careers, I started working again at the same grocery store I bagged at during high school.
With no other options, I carved out a career as a retail manager. That job has taught me a lot: humility, empathy, and drive. I like the work that I do, but I just don’t love it. Retail management is about emotional intelligence, and I have always been stronger with traditional intelligence. In school, I was the nerd, never the popular kid.
My failure in college was due to several reasons. Laziness and depression were the biggest contributors, but not knowing what I wanted to do with my life was also a factor. I squandered the opportunities given to me because I was unsure of what I wanted.
Now I know exactly what I want to do with my life: I want to code. Programming has always been something I was passionate about from the time I got my first HTML book in elementary school. Stupidly, I decided not to pursue it in college, and it is one of the biggest regrets in my life.
How different would my life have been if I had been a computer science major? Would I have graduated? Would I be successful? Would I be happy?
I am through wearing the crown of the Could Have Been King. It’s time to find out if I can become a professional programmer. Today is my first day back in college. I signed up for an online winter class at community college. The end goal is to get my bachelor’s in computer science.
In addition to my usual pop culture writing, I plan on tracking my progress in school, my hobby projects, and my general thoughts on programming here on this blog. Time to get work.